Relapse
by Space Surfer
Summary: Will the crew recover after Beka's problem with Flash. (This follows on from It Makes A Lovely Light) COMPLETED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1. Part One

Disclaimer: I don't own Andromeda and I was aways given them back when I've finshed playing.  
  
Authors Notes: Hi! Yay I now have a third fanfiction started. This story happens straight after Beka is released from the med-deck from It Makes A Lovely Light. For anyone who is unsure it is the one at the end of season one with Dylans birthday and the presant Beka gives him. Thats a kinda cryptic summary but I don't wanna spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen it. So thats all really. I hope you enjoy and review. Please, please, please review. Part two will come soon. By the way if anyone can think of a better title please send it in a review because I didn't really know what to call this story.   
  
"Seamus are you in here?" Beka asked walking through the corridors of the Eureka Maru. She had just been released from the med-deck. Rev had stopped by earlier and after Beka apologised a thousand times they had talked for a while till Trance had come and said Beka was free to leave. As she was leaving Rev had said quietly that maybe she should go and visit Harper. At the mention of her engineer guilt filled Beka as she remembered their conversation.  
  
//"Then leave, then just leave and let me do my job. Ya know Harper, I've saved your skin before and I'll save it again but you have got to get off my back or so help me I will drop you back on that trash heap where I found you."//  
  
She had seen her friend visibly pale and his eyes fill with hurt. She couldn't remember seeing him since Tyr had led her to V-deck. Trance had told her how Harper had been there when she had over dosed.   
  
Forcing herself back to the present Beka shouted again.  
  
"Come on Harper, where the hell are you?"  
  
She heard a shuffle from above and then something snapped and a small body fell, hanging upside down in front of her, legs caught in the wires. He was hanging with his back to her, muttering "Ah crap" to himself. Beka held back a grin as the blond engineer twisted around, trying to untangle his feet. She lightly stepped round him so he could see her and asked  
  
"Need a hand?"  
  
"Beka!" Harper's voice rose slightly "No, I'm good"  
  
Beka raised her eyebrow but she grinned as Harper nimbly swung himself up, grabbing a pole and kicking his legs free so he was now hanging from the pole.   
  
"Monkey boy." Beka said watching Harper hang there, just above her.  
  
"Is there something I can help you with Beka?" He asked with false brightness, eyes watching her cautiously.   
  
"Rommie said you've been here for a long time, with the sensors cut. Anything I should know?"  
  
Harper let himself fall to the floor and brushed his combats down and picked up a few wires that had fallen. "What? No, I'm just fixing some stuff"  
  
Beka watched his nervous actions and couldn't bring herself to start the conversation.  
  
"Okay then" she said quietly. She turned back to the airlock. "I was just checking"  
  
Harper watched her, guilt rising in his chest. He knew how hard things were for her at the moment but he couldn't see her. Since he could remember Beka had been the only stable thing in his life. His mom and dad had died when he was nine and he didn't have any brothers or sisters. And after the Magog raids he hadn't even had an aunt or uncle. It had been only him and Brendan, and Brendan was younger then him and didn't seem to understand the meaning of stable.   
  
//"Come on Shay, try it. It's not that bad."//  
  
But then he had met Beka and she had taken him away from that. The captain had no tolerance for drugs; she had kicked out Rob for using Glitz years ago and compared to some drugs Glitz was like drinking water. Harper ran a hand through his hair and sighed, walking through to the mess area. Dropping the wires onto the table Harper noticed something that had been knocked onto the floor. Picking up the flexi and switching it on Harper saw a man looking into the camera. His black hair hung round his face and his skin was pale. His eyes were red-rimmed and as they looked into the camera Harper couldn't help but shudder. They had no feeling or emotion. The blue irises were dull, now staring at something Harper couldn't see. As he began to speak his voice croaked and it sounded raw.   
  
"My little Rocket" He began "I know it's been hard but I know I have to leave you now. Don't forget to keep shooting for the stars. Please forgive me."   
  
The message ended and Harper stood frozen. Quickly he placed the flexi away in a cupboard so no one else could find it. A shiver flew down his spine. He knew who that man had been, Beka never talked about her father, neither of them said much about their past, but the look in the mans eyes had scared Harper. It wasn't the man himself, it was the fact that he had seen that look in Beka's eyes while she was over dosing, when he had help Dylan carry her to Med-deck and the flash had gone. In the moments she had woken up but still lost in memory Harper had seen that look in her eyes. And it scared him.  
  
Beka paused outside the hanger bay, pain creeping through her. She needed Flash. She could feel the need in her as if it was a wild animal. Clawing at her from the inside. She screwed her eyes shut and lent against the wall. She would fight this, she wasn't her father. Since she had woken up the thought of taking more Flash had been at the back of her mind but now it screamed at her. Biting her lip to stop herself screaming Beka forced herself to walk back to the Maru.  
  
Nearly falling through airlock Beka stumbled into the corridor. Her every nerve ending felt like it was on fire. As she looked wildly round her ship she could remember scenes with her father, playing tag when she was six or hiding from him when he was high on flash, shouting and screaming for another fix. Beka shook those memories away, moving into her room, crashing past various pieces of equipment. Reaching her cabinet Beka tore through her stuff, searching desperately, looking for any last drop or a stash of the ingredients. She pulled and threw out clothes, moving flexis and the odd piece of jewellery.  
  
Nothing.  
  
The need was intense, filling her whole being. Nothing else mattered to her, just as long as she got a fix. Frantic Beka slammed the drawer shut and moved over to her bed, digging under the mattress.  
  
"There's none left" A voice said from the doorway, "Tyr and me go rid of it all."  
  
Beka turned to see Harper, he was trying to look causal, leaning on the doorway, but Beka could she his hand hanging ready by his gun. The blond captain was focussing on his words.   
  
"What do you mean there none left?" She asked taking a short step toward him, half desperate and half angry.   
  
"We got rid of it Beka" Harper said quietly, "There's none here or on the Andromeda."  
  
Even though Harper was quiet, nearly whispering, every work sounded screamed to Beka.   
  
"No, no, no. There has to be some left. I need...I need a couple of drops."  
  
She clung onto the edge of the cabinet like a drowning person as she sunk to her knees.  
  
"You can't Beka" Harper said, watching her and fighting down his own emotions.  
  
"Don't tell me what I can and can't do." Beka yelled, she grabbed something near her on the floor and threw it at the engineer. Harper dodged the shoe and let it clang down the corridor, his fingers grasping the edge of his weapon.   
  
"Get out" she screamed grabbing a glass from her cabinet and threw that. It missed Harper and hit the wall, shattering and the little pieces falling onto the floor. Harper flinched but held his ground.   
  
"Don't do this Beka," he pleaded.  
  
"Just go. Leave me alone" Beka yelled again, throwing another shoe. Harper dodged again and reached up with his free hand touching his data-port.   
  
"Tyr can you come down to the Maru?" he asked quietly. He knew Tyr would be running but till then he had to keep an eye on Beka.  
  
His friend started to sob, arms going round her waist but Harper stayed where he was, fingers still holding the edge of his weapon. Behind him he heard the airlock open and Tyr's boots on the metal grates. The Neitzschen ran and a few seconds later was behind the engineer. He looked at Bea and then back at Harper.   
  
"She was looking for flash" The human said quietly.   
  
Tyr nodded and stepped forward, leaning to pull Beka to her feet. The captain swore and pulled the Neitzschen down and flipped herself round so she was on top. She started punching him, cursing and screaming, hitting his face and stomach. She was inflicting as much damage as possible. Harper stepped forward, gun half out of his holster. He winced as she punched Tyr and he heard a rib crack.  
  
"Beka stop" Harper yelled over her cries but they fell on deaf ears. Tyr then growled and pushed the captain off him, much stronger then the captain. Beka was pushed backwards and Tyr raised his arms, bone spurs ready to strike.   
  
"Tyr don't" Harper shouted running forward.   
  
Tyr growled again but merely grabbed the captain roughly. "I'll take her to V-Deck" he said marching her out of the ship. 


	2. Part Two

Authors Notes: Okay so I lied about the next chapter coming soon, but here it is...hopefully good enough. I hope you enjoy it. Please remember to review!!!  
  
Beka paced the room in V-Deck looking like a caged animal as she stalked up and down, sometimes mumbling to herself, other times leaning against the wall, arms round her stomach in pain.   
  
Harper, perched in a conduit, watched his friend on screen. He was meant to be fixing Andromeda's sensors but he couldn't help but check on Beka. The blond engineer was still haunted by seeing Beka overdosing. Hearing someone moving towards him, Harper switched off the screen in surprise and moved his Sparky out of the way. No one normally came into the conduit this far.  
  
"Ya know" Dylan Hunt said by way of greeting "I don't see why you enjoy crawling round here so much."   
  
"Oh, hey boss!" Harper said in false brightness, "What brings you here?"   
  
"Your overrides Mr Harpers" Dylan said, watching the engineers grin waver slightly.  
  
"I already told Rommie I disconnected them, for real this time."  
  
Hunt searched the humans face, "Just checking"   
  
Harper sighed, "Look Dylan, I meant what I said. Those overrides were a plan B, just like yours"  
  
Dylan waited sensing he had more to say.  
  
"Beka told me to keep them up to protect us, that's all she wanted to do."  
  
"I know you've grown up in a harsh universe but..."  
  
Harper interrupted "Boss this all comes down to trust. It's been a long time since we have ever trusted anyone, even each other at first. When I first joined the Maru and it was just Beka and me we both slept with weapons beside us. Only after years, not long before we meet you, could the four of us trust each other."   
  
Harper suddenly stopped worried that he'd said too much to the captain. Dylan was staring at Harper and the engineer shifted uncertainly.   
  
"Thank you Harper," he said "I know you didn't have to tell me that."  
  
"No sweat boss" Harper muttered picking up a tool and poked around on the console.   
  
"She's going to be fine Harper" Dylan said.  
  
Harper looked up, faking innocence, "Who?"   
  
Dylan gave him a 'don't give me that crap' look and Harper fidgeted.   
  
"I know boss"   
  
Dylan smiled and turned to leave, he hesitated, "If you want to talk any time you know where I am"  
  
Harper nodded and watched Dylan disappear down a ladder; the engineer ran a hand through his spikes and switched the screen back on. Beka was still pacing and Harper lent back against the wall, keeping a watchful eye on his friend.   
  
  
Trance had now finished working on Tyr's ribs, the nano-botts would heal the break and he was free to go. She watched the Neitzschen's back as he left the med deck and Trance turned back to the table beside her, the bottles of Flash Harper and Tyr had found stood in the table. Trances tail curled round and tears reached her eyes as she thought about the pain that white liquid had caused everyone. 'There wasn't meant to be this much pain' she thought to herself. 'It wasn't meant to be this bad." Quickly she flushed the drug down the chemical disposer. The young purple girl was worried about Beka and Harper. They had argued before but there had never been this kind of rift in their friendship. Above her she head footsteps and she looked up confused. Before she could alert Rommie to the noise a body fell through the vent and landed in a heap on the floor. She noticed at once the blond hair and she smiled slightly before she heard his groan of pain.   
  
"Harper are you okay?"   
  
He lifted his head up and tried to smile at his friend, his right arm clutching his left.  
  
"The support was a little weak, I'll have to fix that"  
  
Andromeda's hologram appeared and stood beside them, "Some of my ducts are not meant to be crawled through"  
  
"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't think I weighed that much."   
  
Trance smiled and helped him to his feet. "Let me look at your arm."  
  
Harper followed over to the scanner, which she ran over his arm and frowned at the results.   
  
"You have a broken arm, hold still so I can give you some nano-botts"   
  
"But those things make me sick. Remember when I broke my arm on the Maru."   
  
Trance sighed, she did remember. Even though the botts wouldn't kill him they would make him very sick for the next few days. She couldn't work out how he was just like this with the botts for fixing bones but as of yet she hadn't made anything else.   
  
"Okay, but I'll have to bandage your arm." She said gently taking the broken limb and bandaging it and then putting it in a sling.   
  
"You can't use it for a while, I want you to rest it okay"  
  
"Yeah sure," Harper muttered staring at the door  
  
"I mean it Harper, if you don't I'll use the nano-botts"   
  
Harper scowled "I'll be good, I promise"   
  
"What were you doing up there anyway?" Trance asked. He had reported to Dylan a while ago that nothing needed to be fixed now and he had taken out all the over rides.   
  
Harper fidgeted uncomfortably, "I was watching Beka" He explained showing Trance the scanner he had been using. "I wanted to make sure she was okay."   
  
Trance smiled softy. "She will be okay Harper. She just needs a little time"   
  
"Does purple think or purple know?" Harper asked with a smile.   
  
Trance smiled back, "I know because she's Beka and she's strong. Did you get a chance to talk to her yet?"   
  
Harper's smiled faded, "No, I don't want to talk to her yet"   
  
"Why not?" Trances tail gently touched Harper's back, trying to reassure him and let him talk about it.   
  
"Because she's Beka, she's meant to be the good one, she's meant to be the one who fixes us. She's..."  
  
"Only human?" Trance interrupted "A little lost and in pain right now?"   
  
Harper sighed, knowing she was right "I'll talk to her when she comes out of V-Deck"   
  
"It shouldn't be too long." Trance said smiling slightly "By the way Dylan said we're approaching the drift soon if you wanted to get some more parts."  
  
"Great it seems like forever since we went planet side" Harper said, pulling a spare flexi out of his tool belt and making a quick list of the things he knew they needed.   
  
Trance smiled "Just remember to rest your arm"   
  
"You're the doc" Harper said heading to the doorway, mind focussed mainly on his list.   
  
"And when are you going to fix this ceiling?" Trance shouted after him but he was already gone down the corridor. 


	3. Part Three

A/N - Yay, part three!!!! I'm so proud of myself!   
Big Thanks Yous go out to Claire...Fuzzy Elf...Mary Rose...Lynx...Luna fox...Wildcat...and Parisindy.   
Fuzzy Elf...I meantion Bobby in this chapter, I forgot about him before...  
  
  
Beka hated these kinds of drifts. Now more so then ever. Dylan had released her from V-Deck telling her to go and get some 'air' on the drift. However Rev and Trance had gone with her. And Beka was glad of the company. In dark alleys dealers were selling Flash, and her need was filling her whole being. Trance and Rev were keeping her distracted, taking her in clothes shops, helping her track down any CD's. Anything to keep her mind off the Flash.   
  
Even though the need burned through her Beka felt something else, something that hurt more then the withdrawal. Across the crowds Beka caught sight of the short blond engineer, walking out of a shop, arms full of machine parts, smiling as he said goodbye to the trader.   
  
"He is still hurt Rebecca, you must give him time" The Magog's sharp eyes followed her gaze over the crowd.  
  
Beka gave her friend a sad smile in return. She had never seen the young human so angry before. No wait, she corrected herself, five years ago when he had helped kick Bobby off the Maru. When they reached the nearest drift and told Bobby to leave, Jenson had become angry...and violent. But Harper had stood right along side the woman he hardly knew and warned Bobby if he hit Beka again he would be one kneecap short.   
  
Beka swallowed past the lump in her throat as she watched the blond head disappear into the crowd.   
  
"I need to go to the toilets" she managed to say, slipping over to the grimy building.   
  
Once inside Beka lent against the wall and took a few deep breaths, burying the memories.   
  
"Need anything?" A voice in the shadows asked, causing Beka to jump and her hand go straight to her force lance.   
  
In the shadows tow hands raised, empty and the voice spoke again, sounding slightly more worried this time.   
  
"I don't mean any harm, I only wanted to know if you need anything"  
  
"What do you mean?" Beka asked, not lowering her weapon.   
  
"Anything for nerves, give you some confidence," a grin flashed in the darkness, "Something for those tremors you're hiding"  
  
Beka gripped her weapon tighter and tried to hide the slight shake in her other hand.  
  
"How much?" he voice dropping to a whisper and she found herself edging forward.   
  
"Half a vial, 150 thrones for you."  
  
"A full vial, 50 thrones" Beka shot back.  
  
"Half, 130"   
  
"Full, 70"  
  
"Full, 110"  
  
Beka hesitated, her free hand fingering the money in her pocket, her nerve endings started to scream again. She was so close to another fix...  
  
"Deal"  
  
Again the grin and the dealer stepped forward, a young woman, properly a few years younger then Beka, held out a vial in one hand, a gun in the other. Beka greedily took the vial and quickly handed over the money, pocketing the flash and making sure it was safe. The younger woman smiled   
  
"Nice doing business with you"  
  
Beka nodded and left the building, feeling better with every step as she felt the vial press against her leg.   
  
Trance and Rev smiled as she reached them and Beka smiled back.   
  
"Where now?"   
  
  
Harper dumped the new parts he had brought on the Maru and slipped his arm back into the sling that was hanging from his neck. He had needed both hands to carry the parts and he winced as his arm throbbed in pain when he moved it back into the sling. He had taken longer then he needed to simply because he was trying to keep busy. Tyr had offered to come with him and help him carry the parts but Harper had assured the Neitzschen that he would be fine, in truth the young engineer wanted to be alone for a while. His mind was busy thinking of what to say to Beka. He still had bruises round his neck, which he tried to cover with the collar of his jacket. He walked through to the small kitchen, looking through the drawers and pulling out a Sparky Cola.   
  
Suddenly the hairs on the back of his neck rose and Harper froze, fingers paused over the ring pull of the can. Some one else was on the ship with him. Harper pulled out his weapon and moved quietly down the corridor heading towards the noise. He stopped outside of Beka's door and picked through the crack, letting out a breath in relief when he saw that it was just Beka. He shock his head at his own paranoia and enter the room.   
  
"Boy boss you scared me for a second..." He trailed off when Beka turned to him, the déjà vu shot to his mind and he stammered out "Boss...wha..what are you doing?"   
  
Once again he eyes were as white as pearls save to two small black dots of her pupils. She opened her mouth to say something but closed it again and got to her feet pushing him up against the wall.  
  
"You stay out of it Seamus" she growled pinning his arm before he could raise the gun and disarmed him in a single movement. She pushed passed him and run down the corridor. Harper heard the air lock open and before Harper could think about what he was doing her had followed her and began chase down the street. He dodged passed the crowds of people, keeping Beka in his sight at all times. She ran into an empty building and Harper paused outside wondering what to do. She wasn't in her right mind and much stronger then he was anyway. She also had his weapon. And unlike the force lance anyone could fire that weapon. He could call the others to meet him but they would take too long and right now Beka needed him. He wouldn't leave her alone again. He took a deep breath and pulled his arm out of his sling, shoving the sling into his combat pant's pocket. Quietly, and using all his senses Harper stepped into the dark building. Shadows lay cast around the floor and Harpers sharp eyes searched for any sign of movement. The building must have been some sort of warehouse as his shelves stood from the floor to the ceiling filled with old boxes that made it hard to see his anyone was behind them. Harper paused, leaning by a wall and listened for any sounds of breathing. He thought her heard his friend when a shot ran out and lit up the area. Harper threw himself to the floor as the shot passed over him, barely. 


	4. Part Four

A/NI finished a story, I finished a story!!!! *Dances round library and gets strange looks* Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!  
Thanks to....Red Headed Angel......Lila.....Fuzzy Elf.....Nicki......aimless.....Claire and finally Janos  
  
Anyway I will be quiet now and let you read the last chapter as I contiue to dane around the library!  
  
Athena Rue reminded me that I forgot to mention that this story idea was borrowed from Stargate SG1's "Need" episode. I don't own them either in case you wondering. So thanks Athena Rue for reminding me about that :-)  
  
  
Harper ducked and rolled out of the way hitting into a shelf.  
  
"Beka it's me!" Harper yelled ducking down behind a fallen box.   
  
A giggle echoed round the darkness and Harper strained his ears to try and find where she was.   
  
"Oh hi Seamus" She giggled insanely.   
  
"Hi Beka" Harper fought to keep his tone light eyes still searching the darkness. "Whatcha doing?"   
  
"Oh ya know" The giggling voice came again but Harper still couldn't locate his friend in to darkness.   
  
Before he could focus another shot fired again, singeing the top of his hair as the engineer ducked just in time.   
  
"Beka! Are you trying to kill me?"   
  
"You're killing me!" Came the angry reply "I need the flash"   
  
"Boss you know that's not true. Dylan said your getting better, come out and we can go back to the Maru."  
  
"You're lying!"  
  
Harper bit his lip "Why would I do that."  
  
"Everybody lies" Beka shouted "Saying their never going to leave. That it was the last vial."  
  
"Beka I wouldn't lie to you."  
  
There was silence and Harper waited tensely   
  
"I'm not going any where until you let me have the flash." Beka shouted instead.  
  
Harper cocked his head to the side, seeing movement to his right behind one of the selves. Carefully pushing himself to his feet he slowly began to walk round still talking.   
  
"I can't do that boss."  
  
Another shot fired and Harper had to throw himself to the left to avoid it. "Damnit Beka" He screamed "I know what your going through, please come out."   
  
He heard shaky footsteps step round the shelve and Beka stood in front of him. Harper pushed himself back to his feet but froze when he saw he was staring down a barrel of a gun. He swallowed and looked past it to Beka's eyes, still white, but at least she wasn't bleeding.   
  
"Are you going to kill me Beka?" He asked softly  
  
"I don't know" came the chocked reply. The weapon pointing at his chest was shaking and the captain had to raise her other hand to steady it.   
  
"Just put the gun down Beka, please, you don't want to shot me."   
  
Harper stared into his friends' eyes, pleading silently now. Fear filled him as the weapon pointed at his chest.   
  
"You d…don't understand," She stammered out.   
  
Harper could see the Flash wearing out and knew the withdrawal would start soon.   
  
"I do boss," He stared at her and held back his tears as he watched the once strong woman shaking, her hair hanging limply and her face paler then Harper had ever seen it.   
  
"My god look at you." He whispered. "I know what this is, Beka I understand, I know what it's like. You can get through this."  
  
Tear fell down Beka's checks and she slowly lowered the gun, dropping it to the floor and sinking down her legs giving out. Harper pulled her into a hug and gently rubbed her back whispering soothing words in the darkness and feeling his own tears fall.   
  
  
They stood in the kitchen part of the Maru, each holding a drink and standing in silence. Harper lightly pushed himself onto the cabinet one handed and opened a draw. He froze when a flexi fell onto his lap and paled when he remembered what it was. Beka looked at him concerned and picked up the flexi before he could stop her. She turned it on and the colour also drained from her face.   
  
"That's my father" she whispered, her voice raw with emotion.   
  
"I know" Harper whispered back.  
  
"He recorded it before he died." She said joining Harper on the cabinet.   
  
The engineer scooted nearer to her and lent against her shoulder.   
  
"Those words were the only comfort I could find. 'Keep shooting for the stars'. I just wanted to make him proud of me Seamus"  
  
Harper stayed silent sensing that she had more to say.   
  
"My god I hated him. I really, really hated him. But I loved him,"  
  
"I know"  
  
  
  
The End 


End file.
